I sometimes wish I was super intelligent. Always creative. Always able to find the most interesting information on the internet then understand and assimilate it into my ever-expanding memory of pertinent facts, trivial knowledge and witty anecdotes. That every time I sit at my laptop, brilliant observations, deep insights and heart-warming stories would flow through my fingers like water-colours seemingly spill over from an artists brush.
Usually I sit here, trying to read articles but not understanding the terminology, trying to assimilate the facts and the viewpoints into a cohesive whole, let alone get them to stay longer than thirty seconds in my memory, and generally feeling as useful and productive as a goldfish.
I can only take solace from the fact that God fills in my deficits. Like some bread and fish meant for a kids meal, in the hands of God I can become a meal that satisfies thousands*. Because his grace is sufficient for me, and his power is made perfect through my weakness**. His power adds what is wanting, so that I am made complete in him. I may be broken down – missing bricks, with mortar cracked and crumbling. But he fills the gaps, binds me together to make me strong, and I am found whole, structurally sound, able to fulfil my original purpose. I am restored to my full working order.
I’m not super intelligent, creative, insightful or artistic. At least I am whole.
* Matthew 14:13-21
** 2 Corinthians 12:9